Notes by Nectar

Your destiny lies in your own hands


I have curly hair.

Very curly.

And I spent years straightening it and trying to make it as less curly/frizzy as I could.


Apparently men don’t marry women with curly hair (because we’re ‘complicated’).

Anyway, last summer my sister was here with her kids and we were swimming every day and it made no sense to blow dry my hair every day so I just left it to dry naturally.

Ever since then, I’ve only had a blow dry if I’ve had my hair coloured (when will grey roots be in fashion, by the way) or if I’ve been to an event (why do I feel the need to do that?).

On average, my hair is ‘done’ every five to six weeks.

So, ever since I’ve left my hair to do what it wants, it’s been in such good condition and I’m really loving having my natural curls back.

However, as much as I love the curls… when I wash and leave my hair, I have no idea what its going to do.

On some days, there are people who would kill to get curls like mine.

On other days, I look like Chaka Khan – Chak-Chak-Chaka Khan, Chaka Khan (Prince wrote that, you know) – and while it may have worked for her in the 80s, it’s not a good look for me (in any decade).


This post is not about curls.

Or frizz.

Or any of that stuff.

I want to know if I over-reacted in a situation.

A friend ‘ruffled’ my hair.

If you have curly hair, you know how bloody annoying this is.

I said to him, ‘Please don’t do that’.

He said ‘OK’.

A short while later, he did it again.

And I said, ‘For God’s sake, don’t touch my fucking hair.’

He didn’t get it.

He couldn’t understand why it was such a big deal or why I was so annoyed.

I know for a fact that this isn’t someone interested in me (before anyone says ‘Oh, but he’s just flirting with you’).

But why (WHY) did he think that it was OK to ignore me when I specifically said that I didn’t want him (or anyone) to touch my hair?

I can’t even explain how annoyed I was by this.

FFS, no means no!

Am I being ridiculous?

Or am I right in being so totally livid by his actions?

I would love to hear what you think.

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2015 in review

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 13,000 times in 2015. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 5 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

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Silent Sunday


Silent Sunday


2014 in review

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 13,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 5 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

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Silent Sunday

2014-07-26 13.54.15

Silent Sunday

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Notes by Nectar is 2 years old today!

A huge thank you to my readers and followers for keeping me motivated to stick with it 😉

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Hello, WordPress

Due to the imminent demise of Posterous, I’ve decided to park Notes by Nectar here for a while – until I figure out what to do with all my old content.

So please bear with me while I figure out how to use WordPress. It looks straightforward but you never know!



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Yes, I know, I know. I’ve been lazy over the last few weeks.

I’ve been lazy about:

  • Going to the gym (I’ve only been during sessions with Randy)
  • Finding a venue for my ‘big’ birthday (right now I wish I hadn’t invited anyone so I could change my mind!)
  • Backing up my blog files so that when Posterous shuts down I’ll still have my content
  • Writing my blog (the last installment of London, the last two weeks in Dubai – so busy!)
  • Writing book reviews
  • Writing anything at all (anything)
  • Reading (I’m already behind on my 20-books-a-year goal)
  • Getting a pedicure (I have hobbit feet at the moment – well, almost)

 I haven’t been lazy about:

  • Going out every night last week
  • Drinking copious amounts of wine
  • The weekly and monthly tarot readings
  • Working

I will be back on track this week, I promise!



First of all, I need to say that Enrique in concert was fantastic. He has never been someone I thought of as particularly hot, but I have to say that the broad shoulders, toned arms and white V-neck t-shirt did it for me. 


The management company (M4 events, I believe) was a huge disappointment.

The concert had been advertised for weeks and a friend and I decided we would go. Ticket options were platinum, gold and silver. I suggested gold as middle ground – we got tickets at AED 550. 

Usual story – doors open at 7pm, concert starts at 9pm. My friend suggested we meet at 8.30 – I told her that might be too late as the queues tend to get really long (I knew this after my Il Divo experience) and suggested we meet at 8pm. 

My friend and I met at the Fairmont at 8pm and then walked over to the World Trade Centre where the concert was taking place. 

It was chaos. 

There were queues everywhere. Nobody seemed to know which queue was silver, which was gold or which was platinum. 


My friend and I stayed in one queue for a little while but realised it wasn’t moving. She then walked around trying to figure out whether we were in the right queue – as it turns out, we weren’t! There was no management in sight letting us know where we were supposed to be. Nobody knew what was going on.

I eventually found my friend in a separate ‘Gold’ queue which didn’t seem to move at all. By this time it was after 9pm. I went to Caffe Nero to get us some water (I queued there for almost 30 minutes and got the last two bottles of Evian) and went back to join the queue. It hadn’t moved.

To cut a long story short, we were in the queue until 9.45pm. It was like being in a herd of cattle. The queue didn’t seem to end, people were absolutely shameless about jumping the queue and nobody seemed to know what the f*** was going on.

We eventually got in and realised that all the silver and platinum ticket holders were where they should have been – so we have no idea what happened with the gold section.

And then we queued for another 30 minutes for drinks (f***ing ridiculous – and people still managed to jump the queue there too). 

We found a spot to stand in – and two guys started fighting with each other. To be honest, I’m surprised there weren’t more people fighting because at that moment I would have happily punched someone in the face. I don’t know what they were fighting about.

And then. Finally. At 10.45 the house lights went down. Enrique came on. He was in a black t-shirt. He started with ‘Tonight (I’m Loving’ You). Great song, I have to say.

The next song was ‘I Like How It Feels’ followed by ‘Dirty Dancer’ and ‘Rhythm Divine’.

Jesus, this man has amazing arms. How many tricep dips does he do??

‘Bailamos’ came after that followed by ‘Now That You’re Gone’.

At this point, Enrique scouted the audience and asked who would like to come on stage. He somehow chose a 20-year-old Kuwaiti guy called Abdullah. Would I have chosen him? No. So Abdullah came to Dubai from Kuwait on his own just to see Enrique in concert. He looked nervous. He sat on stage while Enrique sang ‘I Like It’.


Abdullah then declared his love for his Colombian girlfriend and Enrique sang ‘I’m Not In Love’ (because apparently once you declare you’re in love, it’s all over). Abdullah sang and danced, Enrique disappeared and Abdullah was summoned off stage.

Enrique reappeared in his trademark white t-shirt (wow) and sang ‘Tired of Being Sorry’. I have to admit I’d never heard this song before. He then sang ‘Escape’ which reminds me of someone I no longer speak to for some reason. I say ‘some reason’ because I don’t know what that reason is – and I also don’t know why I no longer speak to this person. I suppose that’s appropriate.

The song after this? I have no idea. I don’t know what it’s called – ‘sometimes I get a feeling’ seemed to be the main lyrics, but I’d never heard it before.

And then.

He sang ‘Hero’.

Enrique came out onto the runway into the middle of the audience, almost to the gold section.


Why did I include a photo of the guy in the white hat? He was shirtless and he was sweaty. It was gross. Keep your shirts on, boys. 

Enrique then picked out a woman in the crowd and sang to her. He hugged her. He kissed her on the lips (illegal in a public place – I must remember this). He hugged her again. 

The music picked up again – he sang ‘I Like It’ and then finished with ‘Tonight (I’m Lovin’ You)’. If there was an encore we didn’t hang around to hear it. If the queues getting in were so bad, the queues getting out would be even worse.

Total queuing time: 2:30.

Total performance time: 1:20.

Worth it? NO.

The lack of staff and complete disorganisation of the event resulted in hundreds of people being completely f***ing pissed off. 

Would I do it again? No. 

Unless it’s Prince or George Michael (maybe even Lionel Richie or Simply Red), I’d rather stay at home, thanks.


Life after Joy

You may remember our crazy housekeeper, Joy

We sent Joy back to the Philippines a few days before I left for London. My grandmother was still with us in Dubai and she had her helper with her so I don’t think we really noticed Joy’s absence all that much. 

It was when I got back from London that I really felt the difference. I never thought I’d say it but I missed the moody cow. Not her specifically, but all the things she did around the house. It’s amazing how spoilt one can get after just 5 months.

I had to unpack my own suitcases to start with. Anyone who knows me will know that I hate packing and unpacking so this was a harsh welcome back to reality. 

Cleaning: There are several cleaning agencies in Dubai so we call for a cleaner a few times a week to do the sweeping, mopping, bathrooms, and so on. These days I make my bed, I make my tea, I load the dishwasher, I change my sheets. These are all the things I wanted to get away from in London – now I feel if I’m doing it here, I may as well be doing it back there!

Cooking: We have a man who comes every afternoon to cook. He makes dinner for that evening and lunch for the following day. He cleans the kitchen and he leaves. He only cooks Indian food and I’ve realised that it doesn’t matter what he makes, it all tastes the same (and this is after 1 month of it). He also comes right in the middle of the afternoon so one of us has to be around while he’s here.

Laundry: Our clothes are still washed at home but most of our laundry is sent out for ironing while Mum does the rest.  

I’m not sure what the plan is. I think once we get back after the summer we’ll have to find a more permanent solution. At least I hope that’s what’s going to happen!

To read more about Joy, click here.


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